Ibusuki-ing

Late last month Azusa, the kids, and I traveled a few hours by highway from Kumamoto to just about the southernmost tip of Kyushu. We spent four days and three nights in Ibusuki (pronounced ee-boo-ski)–famous for geothermal sand-baths–for the purpose of fellowship with ABWE missionaries and a few others as well. What a treat it was for us to enjoy some time with missionaries! This time, however, none of the Stratton family chose to be buried alive in the hot sand.

For me (Nate), perhaps the key-moment in our trip came as we were checking out of the hotel: While standing in the lobby one of the missionaries, a sister in Christ gifted in encouragement, came up to me with a kind word combined with a gentle reminder. In all gentleness and humility she told me that I have wonderful kids (YEP!) and… to lighten up. It was a word aptly spoken.

Colossians 3:21 says, “Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.” (ESV) I believe that is what my sister was getting at. When we (I) have high expectations of our (my) children–this is especially true of dads–we (I) tend to point out their faults and nitpick.

Later, on the way home, I came accross another reminder about fatherhood, this time in a public restroom of all places! It was a small sign on the wall above the … you know … written in Japanese, English, Chinese, and Korean:

Besides making me chuckle, the sign made me think. The English translation is pretty goofy; but the idea is good. Instead of saying something like, “Keep the bathroom clean! It’s really disgusting for those who have to clean up after you,” it basically says, “Good job! Way to keep the bathroom clean!” Perhaps more importantly it says, “Thank you.”

How often do I appeal to my children’s desire to please me? And yet I know that they do want to please me. It is so much nicer to be told that you are something good than to be told to be good. Of course that does not mean that I plan to throw correction out the window; but it does mean that I want to try to avoid ‘pre-emptive correction’ (nit-picking) and instead look for ways in which to bring encouragement and words of affirmation to my children.

The Lord is so merciful and kind to us! I am so grateful that He chose to gently remind me of my need for change (repentance) in how I speak to my children.

Praise:

• for great fellowship in Ibusuki
• for God’s continued provision
• for our four wonderful (sometimes challenging) children
• for continued growth in parenting

Please Pray:

• for an immigrant attorney
• for continued growth of Siloam church members
• for more of “the joy of the Lord” for each one of us

We thank you for your prayer support!